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写作 · 2026-06-18

Row同学的课程学习报告

雅思小作文动态图写作:时态、Overview、趋势分段、数据句式和表达准确性

学员:Row同学 老师:Miya老师 课型:正课 主题:雅思小作文动态图写作:时态、Overview、分段和数据句式

课后复习模块

练过的材料

  • 现场体育项目动态图小作文(课堂写作题):围绕不同体育项目在若干年份中的观看比例变化进行描述。
  • 交通工具动态图例子(课堂补充例题):用于讲解Overview里如何写最大项、最小项以及whereas对比。

词汇和表达

  • 保持,一直是
  • 明显增长
  • 快速上升
  • 最受欢迎的
  • The chart illustrates how the proportion of residents who preferred different live sports events changed over the given period.
  • Overall, football games remained the most popular throughout the given period.

纠错重点

  • residents who preferred;题目时间到2015年结束,应使用过去相关表达。
  • Football games were the most popular live sports events.;constitution不表示图表里的比例;Overview更适合写宏观含义。
  • the highest proportion / the most prominent trend was the growth...;peak通常表示中间高点,不适合直接指最后一年最高值。
  • a change / an increase;change和increase本身可以作名词,不需要随意加-ing。
  • football, tennis, basketball, and swimming games;英文列举多个项目时需要用逗号分隔,最后一项前加and。

可回读产出

  • 本节课写作文章改进版:The chart illustrates how the proportion of residents who preferred watching different live sports events in a stadium changed over the given period.;Overall, football games remained the most popular live sports events throughout the given period, with their popularity experiencing a consecutive surge. It is also clear that several sports showed an upward trend during these years.
  • IELTS Academic Writing Task 1动态图小作文:The chart illustrates how the proportion of residents who preferred watching different live sports events in a stadium changed over the given period.;Overall, football games remained the most popular live sports events throughout the given period, with their popularity experiencing a consecutive surge. It is also clear that several sports showed an upward trend during these years.

课后动作

  • 把本节课这篇小作文按课堂句式重新修改一遍。
  • 优先改正确:时态、the、列举逗号、from...to...、during/over/throughout。
  • 不要自由造表达;先使用课堂给出的固定句式。
  • 改完后可以用同一个评分工具和原文对比,看表达准确性是否提升。

一、课堂推进时间轴

1

检查时态和时间表达

课堂推进:课程一开始先处理动态图的时间范围。老师提醒这道题到2015年结束,所以主体描述需要用过去式;表示时间范围时可以用from...to...、between...and...,不能用since(自从,一直延续到现在)。

老师处理:指出学生原句中prefer的时态问题,并解释from...to...、between...and...、since的区别。

学生原始输出:residents who prefer

老师示范 / 修改方向:题目时间已经结束时,应改成过去相关表达,例如 residents who preferred...;时间范围不能写since,因为since表示延续到今天。

复习抓手:动态图过去时间要用过去式;since(自从)不能用于已经结束的时间段;from...to...和between...and...都可以写时间范围

2

把微观比例改成宏观结论

课堂推进:老师把学生原来直接写“最大比例”的表达,改成更适合小作文Overview的宏观说法:足球比赛是最受欢迎的现场体育项目。老师强调不要只写数字现象,要写这个数据背后的含义。

老师处理:纠正dominant constitution和largest proportion一类表达,示范用the most popular表达数据含义。

学生原始输出:The football games have the dominant constitution

老师示范 / 修改方向:Football games were the most popular live sports events.

复习抓手:proportion(比例)比constitution更适合描述占比;Overview要写宏观结论,不只写“占比最大”;the most popular(最受欢迎的)可以表达占比最高背后的含义

3

学习remain句式

课堂推进:老师讲解remain(保持)可以用来表达“始终是”。如果某项目从头到尾都是最高,可以写remained the most popular,这样比was always更自然,也能避开一些单复数和重复表达问题。

老师处理:示范把was always改成remained,并解释remain和maintain在这里不能混用。

学生原始输出:was always

老师示范 / 修改方向:Football games remained the most popular throughout the given period.

复习抓手:remain(保持)可以替换was/were always;remain后面可接形容词或最高级状态;maintain在这里不等于remain

4

修改上升趋势的表达

课堂推进:老师指出学生原句里changing、increasing等表达太啰嗦,并讲解change、increase、surge这些词本身可以作名词。老师示范用a consecutive surge(连续的快速上升)来表达趋势。

老师处理:纠正change/increase名词形式,解释surge和consecutive的用法。

学生原始输出:which had a changing that was substantial and conceptually increasing

老师示范 / 修改方向:with its popularity experiencing a consecutive surge

复习抓手:change(变化)本身可以作名词;increase(增长)本身可以作名词;surge(快速上升)可用于概括明显上升;consecutive(连续的)修饰名词,consecutively修饰动词

5

处理一句话里多个动词的问题

课堂推进:老师讲解一句话里不能随意堆多个谓语动词。如果主句已经有remained,后面要表达数据在上升,可以用with the figure experiencing...这样的结构。

老师处理:指出remain和experience同时作动词会造成句子结构问题,并示范with结构。

学生原始输出:overall football games remained most popular which had a figure experiencing a consecutive search

老师示范 / 修改方向:Overall, football games remained the most popular, with the figure experiencing a consecutive surge.

复习抓手:一句话里谓语动词数量要受结构控制;with the figure experiencing...可表达“伴随数据上升”;figure(数据)比直接说football games上升更准确

6

明确Overview的宏观意识

课堂推进:老师重点解释小作文Overview要有“宏观意识”:不要只写数据从多少到多少,而要写数据代表什么。比如足球的比例上升,可以概括为足球越来越受欢迎。

老师处理:用学生写作分数从5到7的例子解释微观数据和宏观结论的区别。

学生原始输出:我要不要说他越来越受欢迎了

老师示范 / 修改方向:Overall, football games remained the most popular, with their popularity gaining more and more support throughout the period.

复习抓手:微观是数据本身;宏观是数据背后的含义;Overview优先写最大、最明显、最有概括性的结论

7

建立正文分段依据

课堂推进:老师要求学生先交代为什么把几个项目放在同一段。动态图可以按上升、下降、不变来分段;如果某一段写的是上升组,就先写there was an upward trend in...。

老师处理:引导学生先写分段总句,再列出football、tennis、basketball、swimming等项目。

学生原始输出:some of the proportions is increasing

老师示范 / 修改方向:During the given period, there was an upward trend in the share of residents who liked watching football, tennis, basketball and swimming games.

复习抓手:正文段开头先说明分段依据;upward trend(上升趋势)适合写上升组;列举多个名词时用A, B, C, and D

8

补充时间状语

课堂推进:老师提醒学生写趋势时要说明时间范围,否则读者不知道这个趋势发生在哪段时间。多个项目趋势不完全一样时,可以用during the given period(在给定时期内)。

老师处理:反复提示学生加时间,并区分during、over、throughout。

学生原始输出:there was an upward trend in the share of residents who like to watch football tennis basketball and swimming games

老师示范 / 修改方向:During the given period, there was an upward trend in the share of residents who liked watching football, tennis, basketball, and swimming games.

复习抓手:趋势句需要时间状语;throughout强调从头到尾都成立;over强调整体变化过程;during可用于概括一段时期内的情况

9

纠正peak的误用

课堂推进:老师解释peak(峰值)不是“最大值”的万能替换。只有中间年份高、前后较低时才像“山顶”;如果最高值出现在最后一年,通常不叫peak。

老师处理:指出学生把最后一年的最高数值写成peak proportion不准确,并解释peak的图形含义。

学生原始输出:the peak proportion

老师示范 / 修改方向:The most prominent trend was the considerable growth in the proportion of people enjoying football games.

复习抓手:peak(峰值)通常指中间最高点;最后一年达到最高不一定叫peak;写趋势时要交代from...to...

10

讲解the的使用

课堂推进:老师解释什么时候加the。单数名词后面带定语时更可能特指,例如the proportion of...;但football games这种泛指复数通常不加the。

老师处理:用“那些金华来的学生”的例子解释the和定语的关系。

学生原始输出:the football games

老师示范 / 修改方向:football games; the proportion of people enjoying football games

复习抓手:泛指复数通常不加the;the proportion of...中的the可以表示特指这个比例;后面有定语时更容易形成特指

11

梳理小作文固定流程

课堂推进:老师总结小作文结构:开头段可以稳定使用illustrate(展示)改写题目;第二段写Overview;正文段按趋势或年份分组。老师强调Overview非常重要。

老师处理:系统复盘开头段、Overview、Body段的写法,并告诉学生先把简单句式写对。

学生原始输出:感觉我之前根本就不会写

老师示范 / 修改方向:The chart illustrates how the proportion of residents who preferred different live sports events changed over the given period.

复习抓手:开头段可以用illustrate改写题目;动态图可写how...changed;Overview应放在第二段,方便考官快速看到结论;先保证句子正确,再考虑变化

12

学习whereas连接最大和最小

课堂推进:老师讲解如果Overview既要写最大项,也要写最小项,可以用whereas(而)连接。whereas不像but那样强烈强调后半句,更适合平衡对比。

老师处理:用交通工具图举例,示范car remained the most popular whereas walking/recreational vehicles remained the least common。

学生原始输出:but

老师示范 / 修改方向:Cars remained the most common vehicles throughout the given years, whereas recreational vehicles remained the least common.

复习抓手:whereas(而)适合对比最大和最小;but更容易强调后半句;最小项只有有特点时才需要写

13

区分popular和common

课堂推进:老师提醒popular(受欢迎的)适合可以选择的对象,例如足球比赛;common(常见的)适合描述自然发生或不能主动选择的现象,例如某个分数段最常见。

老师处理:用雅思分数占比举例说明popular和common的语义区别。

学生原始输出:popular

老师示范 / 修改方向:Football games remained the most popular events. / A score of 5 was the most common result.

复习抓手:popular表示受欢迎,通常是人可以选择的事物;common表示常见,适合不能主动选择的结果;dominant、predominant、primary、leading可作为更高级替换,但要搭配合适名词

14

讲解不过度解读数据

课堂推进:老师提醒小作文可以从数据推出合理含义,比如比例上升说明更受欢迎;但不能编造数据没有说明的原因或行为,比如不能说这个国家的人经常踢足球或足球很强。

老师处理:用写作分数提高和足球比例上升举例,说明合理概括与过度解读的边界。

老师示范 / 修改方向:可以说football became more popular;不能说people in this country were good at playing football。

复习抓手:数据上升可以说明更受欢迎;不能编造原因、努力程度或能力水平;小作文结论必须能从图表直接推出

15

正文数据句式训练

课堂推进:老师总结三类常用数据句式:用百分比作主语直接写rose/increased;用experienced/showed/saw + 名词;也可以在名词后加rising/increasing来增加变化。

老师处理:带学生复述percentage作主语的句式,并加入considerable、threefold等升级表达。

学生原始输出:the percentage of relation who went to watch live tennis games so an increase from under five percent to ten percent

老师示范 / 修改方向:The percentage of residents who watched live tennis games experienced an increase from just under 5% to 10% over the period.

复习抓手:rose / grew / increased可直接写上升;experienced / showed / saw + an increase可写“经历了增长”;considerable(相当大的)可修饰growth;threefold(三倍)可用于倍数变化

16

选择适合学生当前水平的写法

课堂推进:老师和学生讨论是否需要背高级范文。老师建议学生先用少量稳定句式,把句子写正确,再通过换主语、换动词、加形容词或副词来制造变化。

老师处理:解释不同学生路径不同:有的学生适合换很多句式,Row同学当前更适合保留核心句式、逐步换词。

学生原始输出:老师真的能拿七分吗

老师示范 / 修改方向:先把固定句式写对,再做小范围变化:prefer to watch / like watching / enjoy watching。

复习抓手:先写正确,再追求变化;变化不一定要复杂换句式;可以通过换主语、换动词、加修饰词来提升表达

17

课后修改任务

课堂推进:课程最后,老师让学生课后按课堂讲过的句式重改这篇小作文,并提醒不要瞎造表达,先把基础句写对。

老师处理:布置学生修改作文,并建议改完后再用同一工具比较评分变化。

学生原始输出:行老师我相信你

老师示范 / 修改方向:不要做太多改动,照着课堂整理的句式改,先把表达写对。

复习抓手:课后重改原作文;不要自由造词或造表达;用课堂句式把句子写准确

18

内部观察:学习偏好与课堂状态

老师处理:老师多次提醒学生不要只依赖背范文、背单词等低思考量方式,并指出学生课中出现看表、想去网吧、想看范文等分心或逃避深度思考的表现。

学生原始输出:老师附近有没有有没什么网吧什么的?我要去那要去玩儿一下。

老师示范 / 修改方向:老师引导学生把重点放回当场写作和修改,并解释老师的价值在于按学生当前水平定制路径。

复习抓手:学生倾向于寻求范文和背诵材料;需要继续训练主动动脑改句子的能力;课堂中段出现疲劳和注意力波动

二、本节课亮点表现

本节课重点解决动态图小作文的核心结构:开头段用illustrate(展示)改写题目,第二段写Overview(总览结论),正文按趋势分段。

老师强调Overview不能只写“比例最大”,要写数据背后的含义,例如football games remained the most popular(足球比赛始终最受欢迎)。

学生练习了upward trend(上升趋势)、considerable growth(明显增长)、surge(快速上升)、remain(保持)等动态图常用表达。

老师纠正了学生原文里多个常见问题:时态、the的使用、peak误用、一句话多个动词、change/increase名词形式等。

课后任务是按课堂讲过的稳定句式重改原作文,先保证表达正确,再做适度替换。

三、本节课用了哪些材料

四、学生课堂输出

时态原句

residents who prefer

Overview原句

The football games have the dominant constitution

趋势表达原句

which had a changing that was substantial and conceptually increasing

上升组总句

there was an upward trend in the share of residents who like to watch football tennis basketball and swimming games

数据句练习

the percentage of relation who went to watch live tennis games so an increase from under five percent to ten percent

五、本节课写作文章改进版

按课堂已讲方向整理的课后复习改进版。由于逐字稿中没有完整最终定稿,以下内容只使用本节课明确讲过的结构、句式和表达方向。

The chart illustrates how the proportion of residents who preferred watching different live sports events in a stadium changed over the given period.

Overall, football games remained the most popular live sports events throughout the given period, with their popularity experiencing a consecutive surge. It is also clear that several sports showed an upward trend during these years.

During the given period, there was an upward trend in the share of residents who liked watching football, tennis, basketball, and swimming games. The percentage of residents who watched live football games experienced a considerable growth, rising from 15% to just under 25%. Similarly, the figure for tennis games increased from just under 5% to 10% over the period.

Basketball and swimming games also saw increases, although their changes were less prominent than that of football. These figures show that football was not only the leading live sports event but also became increasingly popular over the ten years.

六、本节课纠错

原句问题推荐表达记忆方法
residents who preferred题目时间到2015年结束,应使用过去相关表达。
Football games were the most popular live sports events.constitution不表示图表里的比例;Overview更适合写宏观含义。
the highest proportion / the most prominent trend was the growth...peak通常表示中间高点,不适合直接指最后一年最高值。
a change / an increasechange和increase本身可以作名词,不需要随意加-ing。
football, tennis, basketball, and swimming games英文列举多个项目时需要用逗号分隔,最后一项前加and。

七、定稿作文 / 改写方向

IELTS Academic Writing Task 1动态图小作文 课堂未形成完整最终定稿;已按课堂讲解方向整理复习版

The chart illustrates how the proportion of residents who preferred watching different live sports events in a stadium changed over the given period.

Overall, football games remained the most popular live sports events throughout the given period, with their popularity experiencing a consecutive surge. It is also clear that several sports showed an upward trend during these years.

During the given period, there was an upward trend in the share of residents who liked watching football, tennis, basketball, and swimming games. The percentage of residents who watched live football games experienced a considerable growth, rising from 15% to just under 25%. Similarly, the figure for tennis games increased from just under 5% to 10% over the period.

Basketball and swimming games also saw increases, although their changes were less prominent than that of football. These figures show that football was not only the leading live sports event but also became increasingly popular over the ten years.

八、课后任务

九、方法和词汇

方法总结

  • 动态图先看时间,已经结束的时间用过去相关表达。
  • Overview先抓最大项;最小项只有有特点时再写。
  • 正文段先说明分段依据,再写具体数据。
  • 用少量稳定句式反复写对,再通过词汇和修饰语做变化。

补充词汇

  • illustrate:展示,说明;The chart illustrates how the figures changed.
  • remain:保持,一直是;Football games remained the most popular.
  • proportion:比例;the proportion of residents
  • consecutive:连续的;a consecutive surge
  • considerable:相当大的,明显的;a considerable growth
  • whereas:而,用于对比;Cars remained the most common, whereas recreational vehicles remained the least common.